Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Criminal Week Continues!

Over the weekend a flaming haired gent by the name of Gary Allen Lintz was arrested for allegedly starting fires in the 48oo acre tinder box known as Griffith Park.


Gary

Mr. Lintz, whose resume boasts a previous arson conviction and an impressive array of public intoxication violations was nabbed by an undercover unit as he left the scene of a freshly sparked fire by trying to blend in with a group of cyclists.

His only problem was that he didn't exactly blend in as he was dressed like an arsonist and the other cyclists were dressed like cyclists.

"Lintz stood out because he was not dressed in racing apparel. "He didn't fit in with the other bicyclers," Miller said."

As awesome as it is that the cops are out there making a difference, ol' Gary really needs brush up on his criminal skills. Not that I'm entirely versed in such matters but shouldn't a marginally sane criminal's number one goal be to not get caught? Sure, he probably thought laying down a few hundred bucks to make a proper "cyclist disguise" was a waste of beer and lighter money but that amount is chump change compared to his $75, 000 bail.

Now poor Gary's in jail staring at the ceiling and mentally kicking himself for at very least not storing his gas in one of them "bike bottles." Oh well, maybe if Gary's lucky he can tune in an episode or two of "CHiP's" on the jail house TV and get some pointers because even the dumbest of criminals were always able to make it to the end of a show before getting reeled in by Ponch and John.




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